To those who don’t understand, and refuse to try…

… I’d like to give you the largest FUCK YOU!


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It’s one thing when a person who hasn’t experienced anxiety (or depression or ANY mental illness) and doesn’t understand it, questions your behavior, but is willing to listen, learn and work with you.

It is QUITE another, when someone THINKS they know what you’re experiencing, or even better thinks you’re simply overreacting, or you’re a slacker, or you’re too shy, or too nice, or have no confidence. The one that takes the cake for me though, is incompetent. I can just FEEL the steam coming out of my ears right now.

I just cannot understand how a person can possibly think that they know everything, and that because they are “the boss”, they know how to manage people and get them to do what they want. I ESPECIALLY cannot understand how anyone could think it was okay to bully someone to try and get them to be “better”.  Come on now, really, a public school elementary principal, who pushes for inclusion and differentiation for students, expects all her teachers to be all exactly the same, picture perfect people. It makes me want to vomit!

I HATE HATE HATE when people think they can talk to you like they are disciplining a child, or like they think they can just snap you out of whatever your feeling.  Saying things like:

“Oh stop, you’ll be fine.”

“You’re acting like a baby.”

“You’re a little girl inside a big girl’s body.”

“Just don’t think about it.”

“Why are you so lazy?”

“Just get up and do it.”

If you can’t even take 5 seconds to ask me what I need if you see I’m in distress, rather than bark at me what it is YOU think I need, then just stay the fuck away from me. I do not need people like that in my life, nor do I want them.

CLEARLY… this is a quality in people, or attitude that some people have, (whatever you want to call it)  that bugs the HELL out of me! You may or may not know why a person is acting the way they are, but frankly it’s none of your damn business unless I choose to make it your business. If you feel the need to try and help, don’t be a douche bag and bark out orders, or “tough love” as some like to call it.

Here’s a genius idea! How about you ask if there’s anything I need, or if you can help me in any way. THEN, try actually LISTENING to what I have to say. Asking instead of telling is the first step, but listening and following through is the 2nd. Just because you ask me how I’m feeling or if I need anything, doesn’t then give you the go ahead to be a dick.

Please people, I beg of you, don’t go around thinking you know everything. If you come across someone who displays behaviors that you don’t understand, DON’T try to take it upon yourself to “fix” them. If you want to help, ask questions, listen, do your research, and above all, BE KIND!

***I’d like to say, I know this post is less than kind, so I kind of contradict myself in the end, but I was feeling the need to vent about this today. Thanks for reading!!!

4 thoughts on “To those who don’t understand, and refuse to try…

  1. stronglotusyogi says:

    I agree, so many people who cannot fathom what anxiety is like are the first to tell you how to handle it. Or worse, they judge. Sending good vibes girl!


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